Hey hey!! I know it's been a while, but I'm back, betches ;) And to the one person still reading this blog, this one goes out to YOU! (Mom, if it's you, pretend you're someone else, in the comments...) So, my parents just visited me in Los Angeles, and if it's not cool to wanna … Continue reading Bairs / Los Angeles
I was thinking, YES. This is a happening. I got my boots, my LA-fake-Autumn sweater… my pleather H&M pants that fit like a glove. Like a glove that’s one size too small, on the hand of a man with sausage fingers. BUT. Still good. In my mind I almost looked like: Or even a little … Continue reading The Pleather Pants
It's my super favorite time of year at my delivery job! Where the night settles in just as my shift is starting, and I'm blindly feeling for doorbells and buzzers on dark porches where people have forgotten to leave the lights on for "service workers", like me. When dead bodies, bloody brides and elaborate pumpkin arrangements are common … Continue reading Rich-or-Treat.
I went to a callback yesterday for a job that I'm definitely booking because if there's one thing I know about this town, it's that forcing your hair into beachy waves and whitening your teeth with a homemade peroxide solution equals a successful career! I arrived at this callback in the same clothes I wore … Continue reading Crybaby.
I got into a fight. In a back alley. I was outnumbered, but I was armed. With my "sass mouth" as my Mom would call it. But first, let me give you some history 'bout this alley n me. I've spent the past year driving through the alley in my car. I know all the potholes … Continue reading Pillow (Store) Fight.